Shut up already!

Yes, I KNOW I AM FAT. SO SHUT UP ALREADY! I don't need you to tell me I'm fat, I can see it myself. I am FINE the way I am! I'd rather you be MORE concerned about my RECURRING HEADACHE, than about my "BLUBBER." I already have to spend 1/2 of my current life doing SHIT I DON'T LIKE (Studying), and I have NO DAMN interest to do OTHER things that I don't like (Going on a diet and exercising DAILY).

Health issues? Sure, what don't you send me for a CAT scan for my head first before working on my "winter storage." At least my extra layering doesn't cause me PAIN yet. If my weight really gives me health problems, so be it. If I die, I die. I've NEVER been interested in LIVING ANYWAYS! If i have serious health problems and fall really sick, I'll be WISE enough to "Take Care" of myself than to spend anymore of your precious money. I won't be able to repay in one lifetime, or what remains of it.

I hate myself enough already. I hate myself for hating myself. I don't need YOU to encourage it.

I don't know when I'm gonna lose it. listening to the rain... 11:19 PM 0 comments

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Sian

Of all the damn stupid things I do, I had to fall sick as the weekends near. Felt it coming on Thursday already, and I thot I'd be fine if I down a gallon of water. No, it stuck. Woke up this morning with a really tight throat, and limp body. That was enough to discourage me from getting up at 6am to go for lecture.

And evidently, thats the last thing I should do when I'm sick: Stay home. I stayed home, thinking I can slack off the whole day, drink lots of water, take lots of naps, play lots of Guild Wars. No, my life would have been a whole lot better if things always work out the way I want them to. I stayed home and had to help with looking after Isaac, feeding him and stuff. ARGH! That boy takes forever to chew!

Okay, on the bright side, I caught like 5 episodes worth of Heroes. That made things a lil cheery, despite the plot being about the World's end, and contains scenes of explicit violence and gore. Some strange things make me feel better.

Some other simpler things, confuse me. I think I do, but I know I can't. What utter bullshit this life is.

And other things, just piss me off. Shan't elaborate. But when I trace it all the way, I realise I'm really pissed at myself.

I really oughta find something to be happy about. No... I needa... listening to the rain... 12:38 AM 0 comments

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Change

Thats the title of the new Monkey Majik song I'm hooked on to. It seems that their popularity is really pick up around the world. Its fusion of Jap and English music seems to be well appreciated by the Japanese and English speaking world. I think part of that unique blend is due to their collaborations with various Japanese artistes. Sounds like I'm describing coffee, I know, but thats how I see them. A very unique blend of east-meets west coffee.

Take a listen to "Change" and you'll know what I mean. I was captured by initial intro done by the Yoshida Bros on the Shamisen (A traditional Japanese 3 string lute popularised in the Edo era). It gave it a real classical sound, almost like what you hear in those really old Samurai movies when the suspense or actions hypes up. But what really impressed me more was the way they played that instrument meet the pace and rhythm of this very "Western" based song, giving it a very unique oriental flair.

Love it!

Give it a listen. Go on! (Click the lil green play icon on the bottom right of my blog in case my embedded music is still playing.)

listening to the rain... 12:20 AM 0 comments

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Heroes!

I love the narrations from Heroes. The narrations are always something that sparks off a whole chain of deep thoughts.

Where does it come from? This quest... this need to solve life's mysteries for the simplest of questions can never be answered. Why are we here? What is the soul? Why do we dream? Perhaps we would be better off not looking at all. Not delving, not yearning. That's not human nature, not the human heart. That is not why we are here.

This quest... this need to solve life's mysteries. In the end what does it matter when the human heart can only find meaning in the smallest of moments? They're here... among us... in the shadows, in the light, everywhere. Do they even know yet?

We all imagine ourselves the agents of our destiny. Capable of determining our own fate. But have we truly any choice in when we rise... or when we fall... or does a force larger than ourselves bid us our direction? Is it evolution that takes us by the hand... does science point our way... or is it God who intervenes... keeping us safe?

For all his bluster, it is the sad province of Man that he cannot choose his triumph. He can only choose how he will stand when the call of destiny comes... hoping that he'll have the courage to answer.

I've always asked myself, what its my purpose, my destiny, my higher calling? I'm so small, so insignificant, what can I possibly achieve? If my life is truly so insignificant and useless, that I'm born to work, breed and die, then I'd rather choose to die now. No, there i more to life. More than just trying to win this rat race. More than just being a rat.

So strange, to see my classmates, and friends around me getting attached. And the same awkward misunderstanding that I'm attached as well. For the record, I'm not. Do I plan to? Yes. Unfortunately, I've got an unbelievably bad track record of failed relationships and I'm not sure I dare to risk any friendships like this. Commitment phobic? Maybe... listening to the rain... 1:28 AM 0 comments

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Heroes

Grabbed this new drama series from Christine at the clubhouse today. And I have to say, I was captured by it the moment I saw it.

Its a drama series about a few exceptional humans, who discover themselves to have extraordinary powers. The most unbelievable was the college babe thats practically indestructible. She jumps off buildings, breaks every bone, and recovers immediately. She gets her hand all mangled up in the washer, and recovers immediately. Amazing.

Of course none of it is true, and its just a pure entertainment. But i guess a lot of us like this series cos we all secretly wish we had some sort of super power. Something that would make me feel special, feel appreciated, feel loved?

*Shrugs*

Heroes, worth watching. listening to the rain... 1:04 AM 0 comments

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How far have we fallen?

I used to know someone. Someone who had dreams. Not very big dreams. But at least his dreams were good, noble and not entirely selfish. He had good aims, and a simple ambition. He hoped to use his ambitions to prosper others around him, to speak out for those who can't. And for that, he worked hard.

He doesn't seem to be around anymore. Instead, now I know someone who has bigger dreams. But not very noble. They are big dreams, and very ambitious ones. He seeks to prosper himself, and gratify his own desires. He looks to use others around him, to help accomplish his dreams. And for that, he worked hard too.


How far have we fallen?


Yesterday was really really long. Got up in the morning to meet the rest of the guys from cell for a lil run-walk down at MacRitchie again. And to spice things up, they were given a 15min head start ahead of us. So we ran and walk... until the steep incline at treetop walk. Nearly died there.

Had a good meal at longhouse after that. Realised that Ben from the YouthBand actually works for his Dad's Chicken rice stall there. Decided to patronise him there and got a good discount instead! WOO! Its nice having friends all over. You never know when you'll meet into tiny lil fortunes like that.

Rushed back home to shower, change and head back to school for Archery Camp. Make no mistake, I wasn't gonna stay over. I wanted to help out with their night walk thing. And I did. Helped to "leash" down the year 1s a bit b4 the walk so the others can prepare for the walk.

It lasted til 3am, and by the time Eaton sent me home, it was like 4am liao. GOt home tired like hell and still kena scolded by my mom in the morning. Haiz.

Was doing a lil leisure reading on Chinese astrology, I discovered something interesting. I'm a metal-rooster, born on a metal-day, and in the hour of the hidden rooster. In otherwords, im doubly cock, and doubly dense! listening to the rain... 1:23 AM 0 comments

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Back to School!

Yeap, school started again. In a blink of an eye, the first week is about to be over. Saw the modules we would be taking this semester, nothing difficult. A walk in the park. Quite surprising since this is my third year. Looks like I picked the right time to take my CCNA exam.

Oh, did I mention that this is gonna be long post. Its been a while since I posted anyways.

Recounting what happened since I left NCS... I went pubbing! Its been a long while since I did that. Sat down with some of the senior (legal) archers at Harry's to enjoy a couple of round of drinks. We were like super HIGH lar, and ended up taking a lot of stupid compromising pictures. For example...


Congratulations to Sam on securing the Heineken award!


Presenting the Heineken Mickey Mouse-S!!



...and The Heineken Minnie Mouses-S!


The winners of Manhunt April 14th 2007!


Presenting the Heineken Gang!

Strangely though, none of us ordered any Heinekens! LOL!


Spent yesterday sitting in with the rest of the Archers at the camp-prep meeting. Sadly, I won't be joining them for the camp since I'd be running a lil tour this Saturday. But I promised I'd drop by.

I did however, take some interesting pictures. =D


Our dear treasurer looking a bit Emo-


And our QM looking a bit ... err.... "WTF"-ed.


Managed to take some time off to get a hair cut. Finally... its damn long overdue. I like Nick's work. He's really pro and passionate about his job and I have to say he did my head hair up real good! I'm not gonna post pictures of it here, before i get accused by SOMEONE for being “自恋”。

I've put on weight... need to start running. Damn! listening to the rain... 8:03 PM 0 comments

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Last day at NCS...

I think I've grown kinda attached to the work place and the colleagues at NCS Communications Engineering. Will definitely miss ppl like Andy, Vincent and Jiaxuan. Who knows when I'll see the likes of them again? Hmmm maybe if I hang around some of the phase 2 catchment.... LOL!


Cedric And Vincent at Farewell lunch. All the best!


My last cup of milo at my desk. Yes I've definitely put on from all the Milo!

Good news was, our Technical Services Manager, together with my supervisor is gonna help recommend me for scholarship if I make it to uni. And out of this attachment, I've gotten an excellent testimonial as well as a reference letter from the Director of NCS Communications Engineering himself! WOO!

Looks like its full speed ahead for FYP now! listening to the rain... 11:52 PM 0 comments

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What the Pug?!

Really has been a long time since I last touched my bow and shot seriously. And really it does feel a bit.... unfamiliar. Sad to say, my downward spiral in terms of shooting time is causing me to lose heart for the sport. Especially with the new training regulations... Bullshit. =/

Spent only a lil bit of time shooting this morning. Wasn't in the mood... especially after finding out the field booking was only til 12.30. Ended up chit chatting with Bern who (initially) nicely came to pay us a visit.

We found our way to Tiong Bahru Plaza for lunch. That was of course, due to me insisting of looking for somewhere air conditioned to lunch at. Besides, the food court wasn't that bad wad.

Again, my hypnotic suggestion was taken, and we found ourselves at CityLink for coffee and chill out time. I'm getting good at this! Anyways, we spent a lot of time chit chatting. Well actually, it was mainly BK, Bern and I chatting... the rest were rather quiet. Fortunately that didn't kill the mood. And it wasn't about the mood getting killed that I got sore about. It was that perfect image I had about myself. *Bites Bernice!!*

It all started when the conversation was about how "unfriendly" I looked to strangers, and how much of a facade that was. Honestly, I really don't like being friendly to strangers, unless its part of my job, or I eventually have to work with them anyway. That was when Bernice had to use the most unbelievable comparison.

According to her, my initial unfriendly appearance was like that of a Pug. Yes, THE Pugly dog. (Though I do find them adorable...) That I'd carry that "unfriendly" look...


But once people got to know me, they'd realize that I'm actually more like this.


How wonderful... to be described as a butt ugly dog. (though immensely lovable!) Its okay... I believe I still have some self-esteem remaining. I'm butt ugly but lovable... right??? listening to the rain... 9:21 PM 0 comments

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Reccommended listening!

Sotsugyou Soshite Miraihe

This band is really really awesome. Definitely worth listening to! This unique band that goes by the name of "Monkey Majik" is based out of Sendai, Japan (or was it Sendai, Tokyo...?) is composed of 2 Canadians and 2 Japanese. Perhaps due to its set up, its style is arguably the best blend of Japanese-English music.

What I really like about this group is the capability of the lead singers to sing in both English AND Japanese flawlessly! Yes, the 2 caucasian gentlemen speak flawless Japanese!

Yes, I'm truly captured by their music, but a thorough search at HMV this afternoon turned out to be rather unfruitful. Its kinda disappointing cos their music is REALLY SOOO good. It seems that my last option is to import it in. The question now is, "From where?"

**Bern! This one's an excellent intro! Thanks!

listening to the rain... 9:11 PM 0 comments

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ZObo Lan

Yes I am bored at home. I actually got off work at 4.30pm today. With that much time to kill, I decided to take a stroll down to Orchard. Nothing caught my fancy and I ended up at Bishan Junction 8 instead.

Strangely, I miss working... At least I had SOMETHING to do.

2 more weeks til attachment is over. Kinda grown attached to the company. The people there are fantastic except for our pedigree champion. BK met him today, and is totally amazed by how I can tahan him. Well, I AM a fantastic guy. MUAHAHAHAHA!

Anyways, Vincent brought up something interesting about Ngee Ann City's architecture. Strangely, from an external view, if looked at from an higher elevation, the entire structure looks like a chinese tombstone! The 2 towers, and the center block... slightly curved in. It doesnt help that it has a circular fountain and 5 flagpoles on the outside. They resemble the urn and the incense one would find in front of a chinese tomb! I wonder why... what made the architect design that.

I think I really had fun working at NCS. I suppose I don't mind heading back there after I grad to temp with them. Provided the usual crew are still there. =D Its been a ball of a time! listening to the rain... 10:21 PM 0 comments

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MacRitchie to Orchard!

Its been one long day. It all started at 9.30 in the morning, with a long (11km) walk through Macritchie with Sam, Yaz and Bern. Good ol' Sam boy decided to bring us around his walking route with us along. =)

Had lots of fun with the 3 of them. Had lots of run ins with the monkeys, tortoises and fishes. Oh, not forgetting the poor whip snake yazid stepped on! Hah! We hiked all the way up to Jelutong tower where we initially decided to lunch. Unfortunately, a monkey attempt to raid Sam's "Chicken in a Biscuit" changed our mind. Kudos to Bernice for a rapid and accurate shot at the monkey with her water bottle. Her courageous action no doubt saved our dear damsel in distress, Sam. =D

As we walked, we came across several nice spot to do a lil tortoise and fish feeding. Yes, we fed them "Chicken in a biscuit." Oh woe to the tortoise for consuming such high sodium confectionery. I can see it in the headlines already, "Mysterious plague attacks tortoises in MacRitchie. Dozens of tortoises found belly up. Singapore declares a state of emergency!"

After completing the lil stroll, we all split out home to change and wash up. Nope, the day was not over. We met in town for dinner! Brought them down to Anatolia's Turkish Restaurant for dinner. I think they had a pretty good first impression of the Iskender and Shish Kebab. Woo!

Most of us split up for home after a short chill out session at Starbucks, Paragon. Chit chat about how girls have spectacular wide angle vision, and how they are able to catch guys looking at them. Ha.

Yaz and I decided to go for a short game of pool at Lucky Plaza... yes, Pinoy Plaza. Unfortunately, we arrived to find Mambo Pool & billiards gone. It had closed down permanently!! HOW CAN?!! Anyways, we found a 2nd place to play.

It was unbelievable. Ha. Yaz was so tired out that he could hardly play. I managed to beat him 3-1 games! Thats like... OMG!!! Ha! I think that victory is gonna be short lived... he's so gonna kick my ass the next time. Ha! listening to the rain... 12:11 AM 0 comments

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