Au revoir La Fayette...

Today would have been the day I visit the French stealth frigate, the La Fayette. I was really looking forward to this trip, but unfortunately, I had to cancel on it. Rehearsals for the family magic thing was from 10am to 4pm. A definite clash.

Anyways, rehearsal went well today. I remembered most of my lines. Lets see if stage fright would get the better of me tomorrow and leave me mumbling to myself on stage. Touch wood! That shall NOT happen.

First week of school is over. And my wallet is still burning and likely to burn somemore. Spent $124 on a portable hard disk, $55 on dreamweaver and Flash textbooks, and will be spending another $28+18 on windows 2003 server textbook and some math textbook. Its definitely more than $200... Oh my beautiful wallet, how I feel your pain... my precious bank account, I mourn your loss. I better score like straight As or something this semester. Otherwise, really not worth it.

Now... where did I leave my iBanking password... hmmm listening to the rain... 10:05 PM 0 comments

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Real men

I lost my tweezers, and I had a few stubbles to clear off my chinny chin chin. Frustrated with my fingers... I reached for the next best alternative. Pliers.

REAL MEN CAN PLUCK FACIAL GROWTH WITH A PAIR OF PLIERS! My trusty leatherman never fails me.

Ah.. feel so hungry. I just had dinner... but still I feel hungry. I'm a growing boy/man. Sideways. Came back from rehearsal not too long ago. It seems we've finally got our act together (pun intended), and would be ready for show this Sunday. Exactly what we are doing... is a secret. Oh, not to mention we got consultancy services from the Legendary Johnny Thompson. (Google him)

I think thats all I'm gonna post for now. Got rehearsal again tomorrow.

I have to admit, this is seems fun. listening to the rain... 12:37 AM 0 comments

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Crazy.

There's this song by Norah Jones that I like a lot lately. Its called, "Crazy." I can't seem to find it on youtube for y'all to listen, but this is how it goes.

Crazy, crazy for feeling so lonely
I'm crazy, crazy for feeling so blue
I know, that love me as long as you want it
and inside I know you would leave me for somebody new
Worry, why do I let myself worry
Wondering, what in the world did I do?

Lovely song eh?

Went for a run with BK again just now. He runs at a pretty decent pace and likes to pick up at the end. Haha, its sort of like a little challenge for me to keep up with him for a bit. But today, I totally felt like sprinting my lungs out and just collapse on the floor n die or smth. Naturally, I didn't lar... else I won't be posting here already.

Was late for class again today. The lecturer was so "kind" to 鸟 me about it... He was playing with fire a bit too closely. I'm not a tiger in the morning... I'm a man-eating, head-decapitating, bone-devouring, blood-sucking, flesh-eviscerating monster to those who test my temper. Fortunately, I chose to ignore him.

Need to make some apologies. Sorry guys if I haven't been hanging out with you all a lot. Its been quite a plunge in my mood lately. Sorry Les, for turning down so many pool trips and the Jujitsu class. A bit not ready for that... as for pool... well kinda too demoralised to play. =/

Gonna sign off here for now. Don't really know what else to blog.

*PS: SP Archers, will be looking forward to seeing you all at Expo Max Pavilion this Sunday. Remember, its at 1.30pm. Call me or Leonard if you guys are not sure of the location.


listening to the rain... 8:07 PM 0 comments

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Math tutorial @ 8am? Nuts!

I'm beat. Just ended rehearsal's for this Sunday's thing at 10pm just now. We've been at it since 4pm. At first, I was told that my dad would just produce our whole family on stage. Now it seems that my brother and I would have to handle one illusion as well. *sigh*

Shifting goal posts... Aiy. I'm not a really stage-show-type of person. I hate being in the spotlight or being noticed by a whole bunch of ppl I don't know. Unfortunately, I'm not given a choice in this "presentation." Okay lar, i'm not unhappy doing this... but I'm just not sure if I can excel at such things. Its really not me.

A bit tired to blog abt the other stuff. Same old problem the last few days, for those who knows wad im talking abt. =/ listening to the rain... 10:35 PM 0 comments

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Smoke gets in my eyes.... *tears*

My wallet's smouldering badly... And from the looks of it, its gonna burn into ashes soon. This is part 3 of my hard disk saga.

Episode 1
Long long time ago in a Galaxy far far away... Anthony's portable hard disk, a Samsung 40gig 2.5inch hard drive died on him. It was a crucial device, as his entire univers was backed up onto it. Unfortunately, Murphy discovered its importance, and got his grubby meat hooks on it. Dark Lord Murphy, tainted by the Dark Side, with his command of the "Force" managed to damage the hard disk while Anthony was reformatting his laptop and destroyed his universe.

Episode 2
Unknown to what the Evil Dark Lord of circumstances has done. Anthony bore hopes of saving the universe. For that, he had to make a long and hazardous journey to Expo Max Pavillion to meet Grand Master Vincent. Master Vincent owed Anthony a favor since he told Anthony's mom about the Ikea event. After much deliberation, the hard drive was tested. The casing was fine and the drive was damage... it was heavy blow for Anthony. He went back disappointed.

Episode 3.
Broken, but undefeated, the young Padawan decides that its up to him to rebuild his universe. He had to escape from the evil clutches of Murphy's law. At great expense and damage to his wallet, he purchases a new portable hard drive to rebuild his universe in. This time, its a Seagate 80 gig. Unfortunately, in the rebuild process, the hard disk start bleep upon connection to the laptop.... but everything was resolved when he re-plugged in the harddisk again. Just a sign that the Dark Lord Murphy is watching....

Thats all for now. Will extend my blog later. Fingers cramping. listening to the rain... 8:17 PM 0 comments

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Chinese a lil Rusty...

问世界情为何物？。。。

我大概是个容易动情字的一个人吧。。。 一两天没跟她通电话，就觉得浑身不自在。心情也似乎差了一点。今天，和她通了几个短讯。本来还以为心情会好一点。。。 我也不知该则么解释。 我只觉得，她好像不在乎我。 我好像爱上了一个大忙人。。。 真糟糕。。。

pfft... enough chinese for one night. My chinese is horrid. Probably got most of the words wrong as well. But at least I said what I wanted to say.

Went for a short jog with BK. I'm really really really out of shape, and apparently, I am supposed to go register to take my IPPT on my own rather than wait for their letter. How... IPPT round the corner and I'm like that... die lar.

First day of school, nothing exciting. I realised that we'd be doing JAVA again though... this time for wireless applications. Eg cellphones n stuff. The lecturer seems to like to emphasize that there's big money to be made in this area... Can someone shut him up? Whatever money there is to be made, huge companies have already started virtual "oil rigs" milking it already. Small fry diploma grads like me aren't gonna get much of a cut of it. I'm being dead honest.

Hmm, met Mr Kenny Seah again. He's taking us for our Flash and Dreamweaver module. Since I've got Dreamweaver more or less covered, its just Flash that remains. I'm not much of a creative person, so I don't really think I'm gonna do well for this module at all. Wow... thats pretty "optimistic" of me...

I was just about to look forward to this weekend when my brains slammed the brakes on it. Its gonna be a Family Magic Sunday... and my dad's gonna try to magically produce me and my brother in church service on stage. Without my consent of course. Anyone interested to come down n watch? I might accidentally turn into a cockroach to be stepped on. Come! Hava good laugh and a squish!

Somebody saaaaaaave me... Wait. I was just begging to be killed the other day. Okay, only 1 person is allowed to save me. The rest of you are welcomed to make attempts on my life. listening to the rain... 9:04 PM 0 comments

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Anyone up for a drink?

Feel like getting out for a drink. A Beamish or Kilkenny's... anything.

Feel the need to sit down, drink, stone and not talk. There's nothing to say, and no other way to express. Just wanna get lost in the silence and in my own mind.

Any takers? Be prepared for a quiet evening though... listening to the rain... 12:48 PM 0 comments

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YGBSM - Don't know it? Google it.

I'm getting frustrated. Over my failing devices, over myself.

Exchanged a few hostile words with someone I didn't expect to... I don't know why. I should have just shut up.

Its confirmed. My stupid portable hard drive is permanently "Humty Dumpty"-ed. The casing was fine, the hard drive is gone. All my data gone. All the work I did in the past semesters, my music, anime... all GONE. Why didn't I do a double back up?! Wait... who da hell does a double back up??!

Somebody strangle me to death now. listening to the rain... 1:40 PM 0 comments

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3 posts in a day...

...goes to show how bored I am at home. Isaac's such an adorable kid, but can be so infinitely stressing as well.

Looks like my downhill run seems a bit more down today. No thanks to my lost backups... Hopefully after replacing the casing tmr, everything will be alright. Hopefully...

The past couple of weeks has been fun. Just that time seems to pass a whole lot quicker when I'm with people dear to me. Wish I had more time and resources to keep it up... Term's gonna start soon, and it threatens to tear me away from spending time with friends again. I hope the friendships, I've built up over the month will not fade.

Oh, Bern, Black Lagoon 10-12, Blood+ 49 were in my portable hard disk when it died... Hope it resurrects man. No worries about Bleach 97, its safe.

Not feeling too good right now. Must be the drizzling... listening to the rain... 11:52 PM 0 comments

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Never better just worse

What a horrid day this is turning out to be. My portable hard drive containing all the backup data for my reformatted hard drive just DIED on me. All my music, anime, and past projects ALL GONE!! AHHH!!!

I still hope that the hard drive is not really damaged. Just hope that its just the casing thats giving problems... *Crosses fingers* listening to the rain... 4:02 PM 0 comments

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It feels...familiar.

Yes, I'm stuck at home, and can't get out. No I've not been grounded. No, I did not lose my house keys. I'm stuck at home cos my nephew has no one to look after, my mom's gonna head out for her conference and polo game. (Check prev Post)

And this feeling of being stuck, while everybody's out enjoying their weekend feels all too familiar. This was the exact feeling when I kena confinement when I was in the army. I lost the keys to a very critical storage area once, and got 5 weekend confinements and extras cos of that. I remember staying in camp, lying down in my bunk and staring at the ceiling. Its the same here... I'm lying on the living room couch, staring at the ceiling, waiting for time to past.

Except that I have my laptop with me, and some msn messages that pop up occassionaly. :-D Now I just need to find something to do... I just formatted my laptop, and got no games left on it. So boring... ahhh!!

Labels: Familiar feeling stuck home bored

listening to the rain... 11:54 AM 0 comments

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Downhill

So many things seem to have taken a plunge since yesterday. Foul ups to plans, things not going right.

For starters, my shooting yesterday was horrible. Every shot I made was inconsistent and off the mark. I don't know what happened, but whatever I fixed on Tuesday seemed to have left me. Perhaps I was distracted... distracted from worrying. Worrying about school starting, worrying about my bad shots, worried about other "stuff" as well.

Sunday's zoo plan is getting shelved as well. At least my participation in it. My mom needs me to stay behind to babysit Isaac and to ensure my Granny n Maid dun get into another squabble. I feel retarded, staying home in the morning just to play peace-keeper. Someone bring me a light blue UN helmet... AND SHOOT ME.

Again, Murphy's Laws triumph. Just when u think everything is going perfect, something or someone WILL come and screw it all up. Thanks Murphy. I hate you. listening to the rain... 9:18 PM 0 comments

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Tiffany & Co?

So err, Tiffany & Co doesn't sell coffee eh? So is that an apparel line?

Yes. Those were my stupid questions. Seriously, I thought Tiffany & Co was a restaurant or something for a moment. Not my fault if they had one called "Fish & Co." Quite similar name don't you think...? Fine... I belong to another galaxy. *grin*

Seriously, jewellery is totally out of my scope. I know the manufacturers of guns, tanks, aircraft, ships... but jewellery. Oh well, better keep up to date on it if I wanna get married. LOL!

Archery tomorrow. Its gonna be a serious day to train. Gotta fix down the form that I had to take a whole afternoon to regain. I totally hate it when I draw my bow and it feels so unfamiliar. Every inch of my body tells me I won't make the shot. Hope its not a lost form tmr.

Hmmm, I wish I have something cool to talk about, but no. I spent the whole day slacking. Watching anime the whole day, napping, eating, totally rotting away. Yes yes, envy me. Its gonna be over soon, school term is starting and it'll be back to school... and skipping school.

Can't believe time flies so fast. One more sem and I'll have to do my ITP. And after that, another sem and I'll be graduating. Don't really know if I want to be some IT techie, who sits in the office drinking coffee, fixing stuck keys for computer idiots, or running telephone lines. Sounds like a boring desk job to me. And I hate desk jobs. Hope to approach Mindef for that job offer again. I hope they'll still take me after 3 years... But hey, who knows? If I do well enough, i may just carry on to uni... and NOT TAKE INFO COMMS!! Hah!

Here is another Rocking Youtube video! Hillsongs: TAke it all
listening to the rain... 1:01 AM 0 comments

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Home alone.

Last week of vacations, all this slacking is about to come to an end, involuntarily. And all I have been doing is slacking, watching youtube, and just drifting away.

Here's another youtube mtv I found. Love it.
Jamie Cullum: All at sea



I think I forgot to name the previous one. Paiseh... anyway, that was Norah Jones, What am I to you.

Tomorrow's another G12 meeting day. Don't really wanna go, but again, the choice is not mine. Gonna have to drag my ass there as usual. I was really quite pissed off last week, getting dragged from our club bbq to the meeting. By the time I got back, everybody was well fed and contented to slackaway. Not much food left too... I get frustrated just thinking about it. listening to the rain... 12:00 PM 0 comments

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Disappointed.

Kinda disappointed about today's training. Wasn't doing well at all. Was very very distracted. Again, my mind is hundreds of miles away... Thankfully, it did pick up somewhat, managed to find my form back and began hitting marks I used to. Have to fix in my form this Thursday... its all about muscular memory.

A lil rainy today.

As usual, its kinda cold...


listening to the rain... 10:58 PM 0 comments

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SNAFU

Situation Normal, All "Fouled" Up.

Woke up the earliest today... as you can see... I'm AWAKE! I think... Got up at 8.50am to do my elective module registration. Decided to take up Boating Theory on Wednesday afternoons. Just realised that it would be taught by the same lecturer I emailed about the powered pleasure craft license. Woo!! I'm gonna go sailing! Lalala!

Gonna head down to school for archery soon. Need to pass Bern her dosage of anime... muahahaha. Sounds like drugs doesn't it? Okay, perhaps animes are in some ways, some kinda visual narcotic. The Japanese are EEEEVVILLLL I tell you!! For those who are interested, I'm currently watching, Blood+, Bleach, Black Lagoon and trying to get my paws on .hack/roots.

Okay, I'm feeling hungry all of a sudden. Gonna go get a snack b4 i change n head out. More updates later! listening to the rain... 9:37 AM 0 comments

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Still a little sleepy...

Woke up at 9am just now. Thought I had to do my elective registration today... but no. Turns out the elective registration is actually tmr. In anycase, I kinda figured I'd like to do the Boating and Seamanship theory elective. Hope thats more fun than anything else.

Was helping Alli move her stuff over to her new place ytd. Her new spot is actually quite nice... don't know why she thinks its so old. Her home is a bit old, but still very liveable IMO. No aircon, but nicely ventilated. Not too bad I think.

By the time I got home, had another squabble with my parents. But it wasn't too bad, everything was nicely resolved in the end. If only they'd talk like that more instead of going into their bull-head mode. If things continue on like that, I think we might actually be able to get along better.

Okay, nothing to do now... chilling at home. Chatting with my granny and watching my bro play his new game on his new lappy. I'm soooo envious. listening to the rain... 12:54 PM 0 comments

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Gravitation

gravity

n 1: (physics) the force of attraction between all masses in the universe; especially the attraction of the earth's mass for bodies near its surface; "the more remote the body the less the gravity"; "the gravitation between two bodies is proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them";

"gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love"--Albert Einstein

So what causes people to fall in love?

Our archery chalet was good. Though night cycling was cancelled, we still had a good time playing mahjong, talking nonsense, and watching silly movies. It served well to get me out of my home for a bit... Home gets kinda hostile sometimes... =/

But, I also appreciate my bed and my room too. Squeezing with that many ppl in 2 rooms is horrible. So bad that I wenta sleep by the pool on the deck chair! So yes, when I came back this morning, i took off my lenses, kissed my mattress, switched on my aircon and slept til 5pm or so. Nevertheless, it was really fun hanging out with them. listening to the rain... 10:27 PM 0 comments

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Not meant to be...

If its yours, its yours. If it's not meant to be yours, then its not meant to be. Was extremely disappointed with my shooting at today's competition. And was even more disappointed with our draw. All of a suddenly our team, SP4, was drawn to be up against SP3! Our own teams. It was a major disappointed since one of our teams would be eliminated at the first round, by ourselves.

I guess I was too upset by this fact to shoot well. Besides, up against our stronger team, it was good that we lost to them and let them through. Our guys went on to clinch the Gold medal in the Standard class Team event. Well done. listening to the rain... 11:27 PM 0 comments

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Competition day!

Woke up at 10am this morning to get ready for the compy. I figured that I'd have enuff time to get ready, and make it to meet them at Potong Pasir MRT on time. Unfortunately, I was all of a sudden informed that they might bring forward our standard class event... So it was a mad rush down to PP MRT.

From what I understood, this was a quite relaxed competition. Our standard class event saw schools such as TP, NYP, RP, as well as some secondary schools and ITE. Some other clubs involved was Singtel Recreation Club and GC Archery club and yada yada... I think our SP team did quite well, or at least our Standard class peeps. Didn't catch our C-class teams in action. Though some of us were not on form, I dare say we put in our best and thus deserve praises for our effort put in.

Initially, I was rather affected by the fact that its my first competition, and the strong winds blowing. It was very distracting and shifted my focus from the board more than once. I had a few bad releases as well, stuff that I wish I could kick myself in the ass for. But despite all that, I was able to get my shit back together and keep my average "end" score to 50 per end.

It sort of didn't help that I was bitten by my bow quite a few times. I've never been hit so many times in one day before... and honestly speaking, I was quite disturbed. This is what my arm looks like today.

This is just the beginning. All that bruising will enlarge and darken in a day or two. Will post more gross pics of my arm in a few days time.

Looks like I need to look for some kinda water-resistant hard paper to shield this from any more "tender" loving from my bow string. OUCH!

I seriously hope that all our SP teams make it through. I'm very proud of our guys, for being able to reach our standards of archery without any coaches.


Sometimes, I can almost sense the hostilities some of the coaches of other clubs have towards us. Its almost as though they are unhappy that we do better than their clubs despite being "coachless." listening to the rain... 10:06 PM 0 comments

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A dash of blue...

Surprised her at the airport today. Kinda funny seeing her reaction... Classic stake out with most likely point of exit covered, with enough cover for individual visual identification. Saw her, let her walk past, then followed her for about 15 meters or so before jumping her. LOL! That was fun.

Wenta town for coffee bean after dropping her baggages at her place. Didn't really talk much though. She was ready to zonk out after all the work and flying. She said something really shocking though... I asked her what she does in her free time, or her fav "chill" activity. Her reply was kind of a, "I'm so busy I don't get to chill. I don't do anything to chill..." And here I was thinking that most aussies know how to chill better than we Sg ppl do. =(

We parted ways at Far East. I had to rush to Marine Parade for Network meeting. She went home to zonk out, presumably.

Meeting was alrite, same o' stuff. Had to set up the sound-system a bit though. Took me half an hour to figure out the guitar cable was spoilt. And all along I was twitching the stupid sound console and nothing happened...

Feeling a dash of the blues... I suspect its cos of all the uncertainties coming up. Exam results are gonna be out soon, I have no idea how badly I've done this round. I honestly feel bad for hardly putting in effort for so many of my modules. Home has become a place where I am totally cautious and afraid to be at. So many conflicts can just spring out at me from unseen directions. Competition is at 1pm later... and I'm still bloody up at 3am.

Sigh, I don't know why, but there's this nagging feeling that I made someone very disappointed or sad. One of those out of the blue guilt trips... Jeeeeeeeeeeeeez WHATS HAPPENING?!! listening to the rain... 2:54 AM 0 comments

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Same side of the moon...

Saw Alli off at the airport today. Well, actually, I went to pass her some travel advisory I printed off the web for her. Vietnam may be opening up, it ain't exactly the best place for a girl to travel alone to. Hope she has fun at the Nokia launch!

Met her at the airport at 1 today, helped locate her check in row and went off for a quick bite. Its the first time I've seen her down a WHOLE WHOPPER! Haha. And all along I thought she was just a "grass-eater." Thank God she's not gonna be gone for long... life's kinda dull without someone to bug!

Went for EJ288 meeting after comin back home to chill for a while. It was good to meet all my bros again. It seemed like I haven't met them in ages... oh. I HAVEN'T met them for ages. =/ Gonna meet guanghan after training tmr for a pool game. Heard that Shane would be dropping by as well.

Alrite, time to sleep. Gdnites!! listening to the rain... 2:21 AM 0 comments

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Full Spectrum Warrior!

Yeah, replaying this old game. But this time its co-op campaign with my brother. My mom just got him a new laptop, kick ass gaming system. So now I have access back to the desktop to play games. So it seems that the first thing we got down to was installing FSW.

Anyways, met Alli for dinner at Spagheddis. As usual, that grass eater had some salad and I totally pigged out on my Lasagne. Tried out some of my magic tricks on her! WOO!! I've gotta say she's a really good audience! (Cos she fell for them!) Anyways, she's heading to vietnam tmr... gotta pass her some travel advisories. Heard something from my ex-colleague, hence I figured it'll be good that she knows what to do in emergencies. Bird flu's big in Vietnam... hope she doesn't come back clucking or chirpin.

Training went well today. Broke my lousy 260 score. Managed to up it to 302. I figured.. wow! I liked that! Then, dear old Bk told me, "Oh, have to shoot 2 rounds." -.- I don't know if I can shoot 2 rounds... Was kinda tired out after 1 round. Looks like I'll have to bring a sugar fix on that day. I still have that same old problem... everytime I make a bad shot, I wince and just think of how bad the shot was. Sam had a good piece of advice though, "Don't think about the bad shot. Don't think... just shoot." We tend to let our "let downs" and "failures" control us sometimes. The more we let them take over us, the more we'll fail. Its a vicious cycle. The only way is choosing and forcing urself to not let it take u down.

Stupid anime taking forever to download.... Bitcomet is sooooooo slow... *growl* =/ Sorry abt that Bern! It ought to be done by this weekend.... I think. =( listening to the rain... 2:30 AM 0 comments

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Soooo full.

Had buffet dinner at Sakae with Amanda, Nessa, n Ben... ran all the way to Rivervale Mall to boot! But hey, it was fun... and funny watching the 2 of them laughing like locos! Fortunately, nessa didn't spit from all her laughter... hur hur.

Kinda realised that my blog is a lil too wordy. Too many words, not enough pictures or music or anything. So here.

Dick and Rick Hoyt, father and son participates in marathons, biathlons, triathlons together. The son Rick however is physically disabled, he cannot walk nor talk. For the past 25 years, his father has been carrying, pulling, pushing his son in all these events and clocked excellent timings. No, they do not compete special events for the disabled, but in actual full events against other able bodied competitors.

More details found here.



Nothing is impossible. Impossible is Nothing.

I'm quite excited about having competition this weekend. Its my first time participating in an archery event. I haven't been shooting well lately, but thats not gonna stop me from doing my best. The story of Dick and Rick Hoyt has been an inspiration to me. No matter how others looked at them, and in a way, called them foolish for trying to participate in such competition in such circumstances, they strove to do the best no matter. It did not matter if they didn't win, as long as they saw each other through the grueling race and brought out the best in each other. I hope my archery team is able to do the same.

Let's GO! listening to the rain... 1:17 AM 0 comments

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I hate viruses, I hate Microsoft. 'Pakes.U', I Pwnz3d j00!

Okay, microsoft windows XP really annoyed me to hell today. My darling laptop was infected by this stupid self-replicated trojan called Pakes.U, and no matter what I did to get rid of it, it refused to go away! It resided and respawned itself in my Temporary Internet Files/Content.IE5/folder and refused to go away!

FYI: That folder is inaccessible normally, and I being "normal", couldn't access it to delete the virus at all! This is what Microsoft does. It creates shadow directories to annoy their users!!

I have half a mind to switch over to Linux after I reformat my laptop. Its gonna be messy though, cos of the entire touchpad nonsense. Need to seek advice on whether I oughta entrust my laptop to Fedora Core 5.

Watched Love Wrecked with Alli @ The Cathay ytd evening. Was 20 mins late meeting her at the MRT station. My bad, I mis-estimated the time it took for me to prepare and get out of the house. Anyways, the movie was humorous, though the storyline was kinda familiar. I swear I saw a movie on HBO where this small town girl wins a date of her life with this superstar, who in turn goes looking for her in her home town and then turns out to be not the perfect guy, and girl realises bestfriend is in love with her, gets rescued by bestfriend falls in love with him as well story. (Breathes)

Anyways, went to PS Gelare's for dinner/supper after the movie. She's really very fun to talk to. I like the fact that she's very opinionated, highly intelligent and so different. She's quite well positioned in her magazine, yet still very humble and sensitive. I really thought that people in the fashion industry were quite stuck up.

I may not be a perfect person, who has all the noble ideals, dreams, nor do I have the brightest future. At least I know I am real. People who know me well, know the real me. Not that I am fake around others, its just that I prefer only to be known by people who really care to know who I am.

Went to school really late for archery this morning. I took score after a sighter round, and got an average 260/360. I was really disappointed with my shooting, as I fumbled on my release a few times. Aka, "Piu chiu." Felt like shit after seeing those kinda shots go haywire and smack in the white and black regions. Had to lower my bow a couple of times just to refocus my thoughts and not get distracted by the bad shots. "Its just the target, and me..." I kept drilling that into my head. Must not get distracted, nor keep thinking about the string, posture, or wadever. Think only of the target... Managed to pull the score back after getting a lousy 34 pts for the first end. Despite only scoring 260, our dear team captain chinyan still decided to send me for the PPCC competition this coming weekend. Its gonna be lots of training for me this week.

Well, this is what I wanted, this is what I'll fight for. If you don't fight for what you desire, and let them all just slip by you... then I say, you'll never truly get what you want in life. You'll live each and everyday, pondering over decisions of the past, wondering if things would have been better if you fought for what you wanted. Sometimes, life's greatest perks is tasting sweetness of your victories, and being inspired by your most bitter defeats. Whatever it is, fight on! listening to the rain... 12:42 AM 1 comments

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"remember the poor" Galatians 2:10

I'm feelin horrible... almost to tears.

Was taking a walk down to 7-11 to try my luck getting hair wax there, when I saw this old lady cutting cardboard boxes in the corner. I didn't think much at first, but the moment I stepped into 7-11, it all started.

I was buying hair wax in the middle of the night, all for the sake of my vanity. And I was disappointed that 7-11 didn't sell the wax. And as I walked out, I remember something that Alli said over one of our meetings. That old people shouldn't have to work so hard, commenting on the old folks working at MacD's. And, that sparked a chain reaction of thoughts, "How would Alli have felt if she saw that old lady?", "Remember the poor..." and such. It was like an earthquake going on inside me.

I had a bit of money on me, fighting my stingy impulse and shyness, I offered it to her. I thought I could calm that lil earthquake in me by giving her some money, and maybe feel a bit better. She was surprised when she saw me, blind in one eye, she looked at me probably wondering what the hell I was doing. I squatted down and offered my best smile I could muster, and offered to her as best as I could. She looked at me, smiled at me, and said, "Aiyoo... kam siah." and accepted the money. I didn't know what to say, except, "Sleep early" in hokkien. It was a smile that broke my heart.

Truth be told, I don't feel better at all. I feel worse. The poor was all around me, and I didn't see them. And I know there are people like me all around Singapore, all blind to the poor. We look but we do not see. We see but do not feel. What have we become as a country and as a society? It took a friend from a foreign land to help me see who our poor are, clearly we have not done enough to educate ourselves to identify and help the needy.

My friends, remember the poor. listening to the rain... 1:42 AM 1 comments

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Confused, and mixed up...

Had another long talk with Adrian last night. I guess after the discussion, I would be repositioned down from youthnet 144 to youthnet 1728. In a way, I'm being "demoted." While I do feel a sense of relief from the stress as being on the 144 requires a lot of commitment. Yet, there is also a degree of sadness, knowing that I won't be together with the rest of my bros anymore. Have to look at them from a different perspective...

Did I do the right thing? Only time will tell.

Got this persistent headache for more than a week already. It refuses to go away, and everytime I frown, or press on my eyebrow, my head would hurt. I don't know whats happening to me... growing old, getting sick? I honestly wish I would not get sick, but die a quick and painless death instead! =P

Just found out that our exam results would be out on the 13th. I think I'm somewhat prepared for the worst. I hardly studied this examinations, and I don't think I will do well at all. However, I doubt I would fail any module. Honestly, im a bit tired of studying. But damn, still got 3 more semesters to go! No choice but to bite the bullet and carry on.

Tomorrow's gonna be a long day. Gotta wake up early for some teacher's conference to sell "Project Smile" to the schools. I'm not a morning person, and I'm no doubt at my grouchiest in the mornings. If you see that I have eyebags in the morning, walking with a slouch, not bothering to look at anyone... Bug me not. I will bite your head off and spit your corpse into the Singapore river.

** Terms and conditions apply. Special individuals may be shown some mercy, and others subjected to more torturous treatments.

Looks like I wont' be able to go to RSAF Open house this Saturday... no one to accompany me. Whats the point of going to an open house with nobody to brag to, or discuss geeky stuff with? Anyone free to go RSAF open house? .............

There's gonna be lots of stuff happening next week I think. Meanwhile, I'll look forward to tomorrow's pub outing with my sis and Alli... If she's even coming at all. I think I should call her to find out first thing in the morning... no, make that Afternoon.

Oh yeah, saw the trailers to "The Host" on TV Mobile. Looks bloody awesome. The story is about a father who goes to the rescue of his daughter who was supposedly taken away, bitten, chewed,?, by this monster that rose out of the Han River. He grabs a team of his friends, armed with shotguns, rifles to look for her daughter. Apparently, there is one crazy bitch helping him whose armed with one really killer looking recurve (could be compound, din see clearly) bow. Yes, my dear archer friends... there is crazy bitch who gets to shoot at moving targets with a bow in the movie. Movie outing anyone? *GriN*

My Sis is asking me to watch "The Breakup" with her on Sat evening. Maybe it might be a good alternative instead of the open house... another movie. I kinda turned her down, but since Yazid decided to "pilot" me on the RSAF open house, maybe i should take up her offer. She did mention she might be bring some of her "girlie" friends along... I hope those aren't guys. *choke!* listening to the rain... 12:24 AM 0 comments

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